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A boy and his dad are walking through the park

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A boy and his dad are walking through the park

During the walk the boy sees two men dressed as cowboys saunter by.

‘Dad, look at those bow-legged bastards!’ He says

The father is surprised and tells his son to watch his mouth

A few minutes later, two more cowboys walk by and again the boy yells, ‘Dad, look it two more of those bow legged bastards!’

The father, quite upset now turns to his son and says, ‘I told you not to say that and I do not want to hear it again, or else.’

Just a few minutes go by and another pair of cowboys, walk by and once again the child yells, ‘Dad, look it’s another couple of bow-legged bastards!’

‘That’s it!’ the father yells, he picks the kid up and takes him home and locks him in his room with the complete works of Shakespeare.

Every day he comes to give the boy food and see if he has made any improvement. Till one day when he knocks the boy responds

‘foresooth father, tis a fine day, might we go for a stroll in yonder park.’

Amazed that it worked and feeling like he is certainly father of the year for pulling this off he let’s the boy out and they go to the park. They are walking along and the boy is speaking in brilliant prose about the trees, the birds, the blue sky, and the placid lake. Just then another two of these fellows dressed like cowboys come walking by. The boy turns to his father and says, 

‘Father, what strange men are these their balls hang in parentheses?’

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Funny Neighbor Joke Of The Day: American NRI Patelbhai

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It was 3.00 AM in the morning and wife Rachel was not able to sleep as her husband was pacing the bedroom floor with self-talking, gesturing with anxiety of some short.

So Rachel asked the husband Jackie:,

“What was so bothering him that he would keep her from sex and also let her not sleep.”

“You know our next door kindly neighbor, Patelbhai.

I had to borrow one thousand dollars from him to pay all your expensive credit card shopping bills.

It is promised to be paid back tomorrow to Patelbhai.”

Then he added somberly,

“and I don’t have money to pay him back. What am I going to say him tomorrow.”

Rachel gets out of bed, opens the window and yells,

“Patelbhai” and then again and again “Patelbhai, hey Patelbhai”.

Finally awakened and wobbling Patel opens the window opposite her and yells back,

“What? What is it, Rachel? It’s 3 AM. What is so emergency. What do you want?”

Rachel says, “You know the $1000 my husband owes you? He doesn’t have it and He would not give it to you tomorrow.”

Rachel then slams the window shut, and turns to Jackie and says,

* * * * * * * *

“Now you go to sleep, let me sleep and let Patelbhai pace the floor till tomorrow morning and beyond.”

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Grandpa was celebrating his 100th birthday.Everybody complimented him on how healthy, athletic and well-preserved he appeared.

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Grandpa was celebrating his 100th birthday.Everybody complimented him on how healthy, athletic and well-preserved he appeared.

Grandpa was celebrating his 100th birthday.Everybody complimented him on how healthy, athletic and well-preserved he appeared.

“I will tell you the secret of my success,” Grandpa said, “My wife and I were married 75 years ago. On our wedding day, we made a solemn pledge. Whenever we had an argument, or fight, the one who proved wrong would go outside and take a walk for 5 kms. Gentlemen, I have been walking in the open air day after day for some 75 years now.”

One friend further asked, ‘But your wife is also slim and energetic?’

Grandpa said, ‘that is another secret, my wife use to follow me behind checking whether I go for 5 kms or sit in a park!!!

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Funny Old Woman Clean Joke Of The Day: The Fourth Marriage

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An 80 year old lady was being interviewed by the local news station because she had just gotten married – for the fourth time.

The interviewer asked her questions about her life, about what it felt like to be marrying again at 80,..

and then about her new husband’s occupation.

“He’s a funeral director,” she answered.

“Interesting,” the newsman thought.

He then asked her if she wouldn’t mind telling him a little about her first three husbands and what they did for a living.

She paused for a few moments, needing time to reflect on all those years.

After a short time, a smile came to her face and she answered proudly,

explaining that she’d first married a banker when she was in her early 20’s,

then a circus ringmaster when in her 40’s,

later on a preacher when in her 60’s,

and now in her 80’s, a funeral director.

The interview looked at her, quite astonished, and asked her why she had married four men with such diverse careers.

She smiled and explained

* * * * * * * *

“I married one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go.”

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