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A Jamaican fireman…

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A Jamaican fireman…

…came home from work one day and said to his wife: “Y’know sumpin, we have a wonderful new system at de fire station. Bell 1 rings – we put on our jackets. Bell 2 rings – we slide down de pole. Bell 3 rings – we jump on de ingine and we’s ready to go. From now on, when I says ‘Bell one’ I want you to strip naked. When I says Bell two’ you jump on de bed. When I says ‘Bell tree’ we’s gonna mek love all tru de night.”

The next night he came home and shouted ‘Bell One’ and she stripped naked. ‘Bell Two’ and she jumped on the bed. ‘Bell Tree’ and they started to make love.

After a few minutes the wife yelled out “Bell Four”.

“What de hell is ‘Bell Four’?” he asked.

She replied : “Roll out more hose, mon, you aint nowhere near de fire.”

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An Arabic, an American, an Australian and an Israeli flew on an airplane

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An Arabic, an American, an Australian and an Israeli flew on an airplane

The pilot says in the mic: “Gentlemen, we are sorry but the left engine stopped working. We only have 3 parachutes left. decide between yourselfes who is going to jump.”

The American takes a parachute and say: “We are the strongest nation.” And jumps.

The Arabic takes a parachute and says: “We are the most intelligent nation.” And jumps.

The Israeli tells the Australian: “Go take a parachute.”

The Australian asks: “And what about you?”

The Israeli replied: “Don’t worry the intelligent one took a sleeping bag.”

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Funny Clean Parenting Joke: Human Race Creation Or Evolution?

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A little girl asked her father:

“How did the human race appear?”

The father answered:

“God made Adam and Eve; they had children; and so was all mankind made.”

Two days later the girl asked her mother the same question.

The mother answered:

“Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved.”

The confused girl returned to her father and said:

“Dad, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Mom said they developed from monkeys?”

The father answered:

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

“Well, Dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family, and your mother told you about hers.”

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Funny Doctor Joke: Nurse v/s Patient’s Simple Operation

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A man was wheeling himself frantically down the hall of the hospital in his wheelchair, just before his operation.

A nurse stopped him and asked,

“What’s the matter?”

He said, “I heard the nurse say,

‘It’s a very simple operation, don’t worry,

I’m sure it will be all right.’”

Nurse said:

“She was just trying to comfort you,

what’s so frightening about that?”

Man Said:

* * * * * * * * * *

“She wasn’t talking to me. She was talking to the doctor!”

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