Connect with us

Jokes

After intense partying with their friends, brother and sister got back home late at night…

Published

on

After intense partying with their friends, brother and sister got back home late at night…

Dad yells, ‘It’s two days to the exams and where on earth have you both been? Why weren’t you answering your phones?’

Daughter: I have been studying for the exams all day with my friends and had my cellphone on silent to beat the distractions. I was so exhausted that I slept on the couch and it was late when I woke up.

Dad instantly calls her friend and asks if she has seen his daughter that day. She is drunk and high and unwittingly tells the truth. The daughter is grounded.

Now, it’s the son’s turn. He repeats the same story.

Dad immediately calls his son’s friend and asks if he has seen his son that day. The friend is drunk and high but realizes what’s happening and says ‘Yep, he has been studying for the exams with us all day. Poor chap, he even slept on the couch. He was quite exhausted, do you still want me to wake him up now?’

Jokes

Two Hillbillies

Published

on

Two Hillbillies

Two Hillbillies sitting in a Diner having a bite to eat. After the meal they start to discuss their plans to expand the family moonshine business.

All of a sudden, the woman on the table next to theirs starts to cough. It’s going on for a while, so Billy-Bob walks over and asks ‘kin ye swalla..?’

the woman shakes her head..

‘Kin ye breeve?’

as she turns a shade of blue, the woman shakes her head again

Without a seconds thought Billy-Bob lifts her dress, pulls her panties down and gives a long wet lick to her right bum cheek. So shocked by this the womans body shuddered with disgust and the blockage cleared with a jolt.

Billy-bob walks back to his table, Billy-Ray turns in amazement… ‘I done did hear about that Hind Lick Maneuver, but i didnt see it be done before!’

Continue Reading

Jokes

A Drunk Man Stumbles Out of A Bar…

Published

on

A Drunk Man Stumbles Out of A Bar…

…and sees two priests walking across the street. He staggers towards the two priests and stops in front of them. He turns to the first priest and proudly says, “I’m Jesus Christ!” The first priest shakes his head and replies, “No, son, you’re not.” He then turns to the second priest and says again, “I’m Jesus Christ!” Again, the second priest replies, “No, son, you’re not.” The drunk man finally says, “Follow me, I’ll prove it too you!” Curious, the two priests follow behind him as he walks back into the bar. Immediately upon entering, the bartender takes one look at the man and says, “Jesus Christ, you’re here again?!”

Continue Reading

Jokes

Magic mirror

Published

on

Magic mirror

Three ladies walked into a bar. One brunette, one redhead, and one blonde. They went to the tender and he said:” theres a magic mirror in the bathroom, if you tell the truth in front of it you will walk away with whatever you wish for. If you lie however, you will disappear forever”

The three ladies one by one went to the mirror and gave their “truths”

Brunette: I think im smart! The brunette walked out with million dollars

Redhead: My dog is my bestie.

The redhead walked out with a ticket for a life time supply of dogfood.

Blonde: I think –

poof

Continue Reading

Trending