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Bad Comedy Joke Of The Day: Dad Got The Best Lie Detector

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One day Jack’s dad bought a robot.

The robot was special in that it could detect a lie and would slap the person who lied on the face.

Jack returned late from school that day and his dad asked him,

“Son why are you late from school?”.

Jack answered, “Dad we had extra classes today”.

Much to his astonishment the Robot jumped up and slapped Jack on his face.

His dad told him, this robot is special in that he can detect a lie and will then slap the person who lied now come on tell me the truth,

“Why are you late?”

“Dad I went for a movie”,

“Which movie?”

“The Ten Commandments”,

Splatt… Jack got a tight slap on the face from the robot.

“No dad honest I went for the movie Sex Queen.”

“Shame on you son when I was your age I never used to do such shameful things.”

Splatt, the dad gets a tight slap on the face from the robot.

Hearing all this, Jack’s mother comes walking out of the kitchen saying,

“After all he is your son, he will be like you”

* * * * * * * *

The robot steps up and gives a resounding slap on Jack’s mothers face.

Don’t ask what the moral of the story is. ??????????????????????

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Funny Comedy Joke: The Most Unusual Funeral Procession

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A man was leaving a convenience store with his espresso,…

When he noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery.

A black hearse was followed by a second black hearse about 50 feet behind the first one.

Behind the second hearse was a solitary Italian man walking a dog on a leash.

Behind him, a short distance back, were about 200 men walking in single file.

The man couldn’t stand the curiosity.

He respectfully approached the Italian man walking the dog and said:

“I am so sorry for your loss, and this may be a bad time to disturb you, but I’ve never seen an funeral like this. Whose funeral, is it?”

“My wife’s.”

“What happened to her?”

“She yelled at me and my dog attacked and killed her.”

He inquired further,

“But who is in the second hearse?”

“My mother-in-law. She came to help my wife and the dog turned on her and killed her also.”

It was a very poignant and touching moment of the man and Italian man.

Silence passed between the two men.

The man then asked:

“Can I borrow the dog?”

The Italian man replied,

* * * * * * * * * * *

“Get in the line.”

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An Arabic, an American, an Australian and an Israeli flew on an airplane

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An Arabic, an American, an Australian and an Israeli flew on an airplane

The pilot says in the mic: “Gentlemen, we are sorry but the left engine stopped working. We only have 3 parachutes left. decide between yourselfes who is going to jump.”

The American takes a parachute and say: “We are the strongest nation.” And jumps.

The Arabic takes a parachute and says: “We are the most intelligent nation.” And jumps.

The Israeli tells the Australian: “Go take a parachute.”

The Australian asks: “And what about you?”

The Israeli replied: “Don’t worry the intelligent one took a sleeping bag.”

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Funny Clean Parenting Joke: Human Race Creation Or Evolution?

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A little girl asked her father:

“How did the human race appear?”

The father answered:

“God made Adam and Eve; they had children; and so was all mankind made.”

Two days later the girl asked her mother the same question.

The mother answered:

“Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved.”

The confused girl returned to her father and said:

“Dad, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Mom said they developed from monkeys?”

The father answered:

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

“Well, Dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family, and your mother told you about hers.”

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