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Funny Dirty Joke Of The Day: New Young Country Doctors

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A young doctor had moved out to a small community to replace a doctor who was retiring.

The older gentleman suggested the young one accompany him on his rounds so the community could become used to a new doctor.

At the first house a woman complained,

“I’ve been a little sick to my stomach.”

The older doctor said,

“Well, you’ve probably been overdoing the fresh fruit. Why not cut back on the amount you’ve been eating and see if that does the trick?”

As they left the younger man said,

“You didn’t even examine that woman. How’d you come to your diagnosis so quickly?”

“I didn’t have to. You noticed I dropped my stethoscope on the floor in there?

When I bent over to pick it up, I noticed a half dozen banana peels in the trash.

That was what probably making her sick.”

“Huh,” the younger doctor said,

“Pretty clever. I think I’ll try that at the next house.”

Arriving at the next house, they spent several minutes talking with an elderly woman.

She complained that she just didn’t have the energy she once did.

“I’m feeling terribly run down lately.” She said.

“You’ve probably been doing too much work for the church,” the younger doctor told her.

“Perhaps you should cut back a bit and see if that helps.”

As they left, the elder doc said,

“Your diagnosis is almost certainly correct, but how did you arrive at it?”

* * * * * * * * * *

“Well, just like you did at the last house, I dropped my stethoscope.

When I bent down to retrieve it, I noticed the preacher under the bed.”

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The police stops a man and woman who have their seatbelts on.

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The police stops a man and woman who have their seatbelts on.

Police: “hi you’re the first people today with their seatbelts on, so we want to give you an award of 5000 dollar.”

The policeman seeing the happy couple gets curious and asks “what are you going to do with the money?”

The man answers: “I’m going to take lessons for my driver’s license”

The woman: ” don’t listen to him. When he is drunk he says stupid things!”

The man on the backseat: “I told you not to ride in a stolen car!”

A voice from the trunk: “did we cross the border?”

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Little Johnny v/s Sunday School Teacher Joke: Making Bad Faces

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Finding one of her student Little Johnny making faces at others on the playground,..

Ms. Smith stopped to gently scold the child.

Smiling sweetly, the Sunday school teacher said,

“Johnny, when I was a child,

I was told if that I made ugly faces,

it would freeze and I would stay like that.”

Johnny looked up and replied,

* * * * * * * * * *

“Well, Ms. Smith, you can’t say you weren’t warned.”

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Jokes

Funny Husband Wife Short Dirty Joke: Bad Horse Riding

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A minister gave a talk to the community center on sex.

When he got home, he couldn’t tell his wife that he had spoken on sex,

So he said he had discussed “Horseback Riding” with the members.

A few days later, she ran into some men at the shopping center,…

and they complimented her on the speech her husband had made.

She said:,

* * * * * * * * *

“Yes, I heard. I was surprised about the subject matter,… as he’s only tried it twice.

The first time he got so sore he could hardly walk, and the second time he fell off.”

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