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Funny Husband Wife Bedroom Humor Short Joke: Undressing

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James is alone in the bedroom when his beautiful wife opens the door and walks in.

“James,” she whispers, “Take off my shirt.”

“James,” she whispers, “Take off my bra.”

“James,” she whispers, “Take off my skirt.”

“James,” she whispers, “Take of my stockings.”

“James,” she whispers, “Take off my panties.”

“James!” she screams,

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

“And Don’t ever wear my fucking clothes again!”

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Funny Clean Blonde Joke Of The Day: Dumb & Stupid Together

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Three blondes are in an elevator when the elevator suddenly stops and the lights go out.

They try using their cell phones to get help, but have no luck. Even the phones are out.

After a few hours of being stuck with no help in sight, one blonde says to the others

“I think the best way to call for help is by yelling together.”

The others agree with the first, so they all inhale deeply and begin to yell loudly,…

* * * * * * * *

“Together, together, together.”

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Husband Wife Short Joke Of The Day: How To Enjoy Sunday?

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Husband [:D] Darling, my sweet heart I will be enjoying this Sunday.

Wife: How?

Husband: I bought three tickets for the movie.

Wife: thats great, but we are two, why you bought three tickets ???

* * * * * * *

Husband: Darling one for you, one for your mother and one for your brother. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Clean Office Joke: Man Goes Into A Pet Shop To Buy A Monkey

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A man goes into a pet shop to buy a monkey.

The shop owner points to 3 identical looking monkeys on a perch and says the monkey on the left cost $ 500.00

Why does that one cost so much? asked the shopper.

The owner says well the monkey knows how to use a computer.

The man then asks about the next monkey and was told that this one cost $1000.00,…

because it can do everything the other monkey can do plus he knows the Unix operating system.

Naturally the increasingly startled man asks about the third monkey to be told that it costs $ 2000.00

Needles to say this begs the question.

What can it do?

To which the owner replies:

* * * * * * * * * * * *

“To be honest I have never seen him do a thing but the other two call him BOSS.”

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